Is her name
when I see wee babies being delivered into this world, my heart always cries secretly. theres so much love i feel my mind and heart wants to give and life is so precious- they say. but i cant quite resolve that within me now.
Wednesday, February 28, 2007
Tuesday, February 27, 2007
The Fist
Playgrounds- emtpty or with children everywhere, brings me back in time.
Today, i was walking back from gartnavel hospital, through Hyndland, and i passed the playground a few streets behind chancellor's. the sun was out, not too glaring, just bright enough. i saw the children playing so happily, so carefree, so joyful and i thought to myself,
"those were the days, free of pain and troubles.."
i remember what 5pm was like in singapore, when i was in primary school.
i would use to have tuition till 3, and ill study till then, and my siblings and i would beg mummy or grandma, to take us out to the park to cycle.
there was once, the roads outside my house had some renovation work going on. mummy told me not to cycle to the sandy area. but i, somehow, thought i would be fine and i went ahead cycling there. before i knew it, i was falling over my bike. i cut my knee really badly, it split opened revelaing flesh and loads of fresh, red blood. i remember crying so much, i didnt even feel that much pain. mummy took me back home, by my hand, and cleaned my wound.
today, the scar remains. its a sensitive spot, when touched, would send tinggling sensations down my leg..
ive always been a stubborn girl, even when i know i might possibly fall. i never thought the fall would be too hard.
i don't know what i think about falls anymore. i dont feel sad, i just don't feel.
i miss those days as a child. the irony- i always wanted to be 21, when i was 12. because i thought i could have everything i want if i were 21. i could be old and in control of my life, and be stable. and life should be stable.. settled.. maybe not. i guess, i was naive- i can never be in control of many things in my life though i try hard. too hard, sometimes. too stubborn sarah...
i don't own me.
maybe, just maybe and hopefully, 25. please?
Today, i was walking back from gartnavel hospital, through Hyndland, and i passed the playground a few streets behind chancellor's. the sun was out, not too glaring, just bright enough. i saw the children playing so happily, so carefree, so joyful and i thought to myself,
"those were the days, free of pain and troubles.."
i remember what 5pm was like in singapore, when i was in primary school.
i would use to have tuition till 3, and ill study till then, and my siblings and i would beg mummy or grandma, to take us out to the park to cycle.
there was once, the roads outside my house had some renovation work going on. mummy told me not to cycle to the sandy area. but i, somehow, thought i would be fine and i went ahead cycling there. before i knew it, i was falling over my bike. i cut my knee really badly, it split opened revelaing flesh and loads of fresh, red blood. i remember crying so much, i didnt even feel that much pain. mummy took me back home, by my hand, and cleaned my wound.
today, the scar remains. its a sensitive spot, when touched, would send tinggling sensations down my leg..
ive always been a stubborn girl, even when i know i might possibly fall. i never thought the fall would be too hard.
i don't know what i think about falls anymore. i dont feel sad, i just don't feel.
i miss those days as a child. the irony- i always wanted to be 21, when i was 12. because i thought i could have everything i want if i were 21. i could be old and in control of my life, and be stable. and life should be stable.. settled.. maybe not. i guess, i was naive- i can never be in control of many things in my life though i try hard. too hard, sometimes. too stubborn sarah...
i don't own me.
maybe, just maybe and hopefully, 25. please?
Saturday, February 24, 2007
The naughty little Ones
a short one.
chinese school was fun! the kids were really really crazy- and im not exaggerating. ashley concluded that their parents have been feeding them too many CNY goodies, hence the glucose rush. class 1,2,3 were uncontrollable! usually, its just 3 boys who have some sort of attention defecit and are really rascals, but today, even the girls couldnt sit still. everyone was so naughty! joseph, vince and weiyao has to literally "hug" one/2 boys each to prevent them from running about. hilarious sight. at break, i had 5 boys running after me, thinking i was playing catching with them, i had them yelling names at me, and whacking my butt?!? after a while, i gave up n started playing with them. haha it was good fun! kids... they are just so innocent. their energy levels amaze me...
but the little one that made my day, was yvonne.
a seemingly quiet, yet playful girl; she sat beside me during class and tried to listen to joseph telling the parable of the paralytic. her first question was, "what's a phrase?"-uhuh, random! and then, she slowly warmed up and asked me," who's jesus?is jesus a girl?"- haha!
"so, Jesus died and rose again?"- pointing upwards.
" so, jesus is God, and all the others are false?"-- i said yes, with much conviction. she didnt doubt, she didnt question further. she just nodded.
"my cheeks are sore..."- i told her she could ask jesus to heal them, because He can do anything she asks for.
"so how can i talk to jesus?"- awwww.
my heart really was melted by her sweetness. her eyes were filled with wonder, and curiosity and innocence. it just makes me want to give her a great big cuddle and love her.
how sweet and beautiful children are.. so untainted by the vices and ugliness of this world. they ought to be chershed and loved so tenderly, and nurtured in the way of the Lord. I love kids:) i love them, they are so so so adorable and lovely!
i truly pray she will find her way to Christ when she grows older. and dear Lord, please heal her sore cheeks! and dear Lord, please take care of all the little ones and meet them in their little world.
Dear Lord, help us to receive your love like children, may it be the biggest love we will ever know.
Luke 18:16-17
" Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little children will never enter it."
chinese school was fun! the kids were really really crazy- and im not exaggerating. ashley concluded that their parents have been feeding them too many CNY goodies, hence the glucose rush. class 1,2,3 were uncontrollable! usually, its just 3 boys who have some sort of attention defecit and are really rascals, but today, even the girls couldnt sit still. everyone was so naughty! joseph, vince and weiyao has to literally "hug" one/2 boys each to prevent them from running about. hilarious sight. at break, i had 5 boys running after me, thinking i was playing catching with them, i had them yelling names at me, and whacking my butt?!? after a while, i gave up n started playing with them. haha it was good fun! kids... they are just so innocent. their energy levels amaze me...
but the little one that made my day, was yvonne.
a seemingly quiet, yet playful girl; she sat beside me during class and tried to listen to joseph telling the parable of the paralytic. her first question was, "what's a phrase?"-uhuh, random! and then, she slowly warmed up and asked me," who's jesus?is jesus a girl?"- haha!
"so, Jesus died and rose again?"- pointing upwards.
" so, jesus is God, and all the others are false?"-- i said yes, with much conviction. she didnt doubt, she didnt question further. she just nodded.
"my cheeks are sore..."- i told her she could ask jesus to heal them, because He can do anything she asks for.
"so how can i talk to jesus?"- awwww.
my heart really was melted by her sweetness. her eyes were filled with wonder, and curiosity and innocence. it just makes me want to give her a great big cuddle and love her.
how sweet and beautiful children are.. so untainted by the vices and ugliness of this world. they ought to be chershed and loved so tenderly, and nurtured in the way of the Lord. I love kids:) i love them, they are so so so adorable and lovely!
i truly pray she will find her way to Christ when she grows older. and dear Lord, please heal her sore cheeks! and dear Lord, please take care of all the little ones and meet them in their little world.
Dear Lord, help us to receive your love like children, may it be the biggest love we will ever know.
Luke 18:16-17
" Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little children will never enter it."
Thursday, February 22, 2007
Analgesics
Poyi and i spent this morning at HDU. Pain management sister, Amanda taught us. she has 20 years of nursing experience and 9 months at this job. she's one of the most, prob the most, passionate, dedicated and professional nurses ive met. seriously, i take my hats off her. oh, and she's not one of those bully-junior doctors sorta person. to be honest, i havent heard much about it, nor seen it. maybe, maybe not.
so back to the pain rounds- mainly PCA management, epidurals, pain assesment, palliative care, oh and definately- back pain. its chronic and everywhere. the hospital where we were doesnt have an A&E,so there are hardly any acute pain patients. most of them in the HDU are post-op. and the ones we saw today happened to be CA patients. there were so many.
there was C. 28 years old, testicular teratoma,gone through chemotherapy. just had a left nephrotomy, and his notes said "poor prognosis". he was sleeping so we didnt see him, i just took a glance. he looks really young.
and M, 40s. cervical cancer gone out of hand. she has almost everything taken out of her. her mother, i dare not guess how old, called to ask how she was doing.
and the list goes on. most of them were on sky high doses of morphine and opiods, and complained of soreness everwhere.
u see them, immobile on their cribs, as if they were locked in. they look at you with sunken eyes that tell you they have been through an ordeal over the past few months. and they ask you "when will this end?". a malaysian SHO i met said to someone, "slowly but surely." i think he was struggling for words. i wonder if its something i would have said. it isnt right to give false hope, is it?
most of the time, i stood at the side and offered a smile and a hello, and a thank you. im still figuring out how to respond to people who are in this sort of agony, who are this helpless, who are.... vulnerable.
i dont want to say "it's gonna be okay" and walk away, because its not gonna be.
not when someone is dying.
i dont want to be overly emotional till it causes me to be irrationale.
but i want to be a human with a heart who will make a difference to someone who's going away.
not responding to vulnerability, gives a pain that no amount of morphine,( or fentanyl ) can relief.
this evening, i bumped into K, again. we started talking. the usual introductions. and somehow we talked about God. oh, because my name is sarah. that was alright till he offered to walk home together. (the weather is a good excuse). but he hopped on the SRC anyway. K was nice in my most humble and wise opinion. somewhat harmless but ure nv too sure. however, over friendly. either that, i was paranoid. and there was a period of awkward silence. i dun like that kinda vibes, cause i roughly know where its gonna lead. and my defences kicked in fast, i felt to vulnerable. not because i was afraid of physical harm, but of something else inside, i cant figure out what. and to be honest, i dont want it to matter.
times are just different now.
and it's been a really long day. night world.
so back to the pain rounds- mainly PCA management, epidurals, pain assesment, palliative care, oh and definately- back pain. its chronic and everywhere. the hospital where we were doesnt have an A&E,so there are hardly any acute pain patients. most of them in the HDU are post-op. and the ones we saw today happened to be CA patients. there were so many.
there was C. 28 years old, testicular teratoma,gone through chemotherapy. just had a left nephrotomy, and his notes said "poor prognosis". he was sleeping so we didnt see him, i just took a glance. he looks really young.
and M, 40s. cervical cancer gone out of hand. she has almost everything taken out of her. her mother, i dare not guess how old, called to ask how she was doing.
and the list goes on. most of them were on sky high doses of morphine and opiods, and complained of soreness everwhere.
u see them, immobile on their cribs, as if they were locked in. they look at you with sunken eyes that tell you they have been through an ordeal over the past few months. and they ask you "when will this end?". a malaysian SHO i met said to someone, "slowly but surely." i think he was struggling for words. i wonder if its something i would have said. it isnt right to give false hope, is it?
most of the time, i stood at the side and offered a smile and a hello, and a thank you. im still figuring out how to respond to people who are in this sort of agony, who are this helpless, who are.... vulnerable.
i dont want to say "it's gonna be okay" and walk away, because its not gonna be.
not when someone is dying.
i dont want to be overly emotional till it causes me to be irrationale.
but i want to be a human with a heart who will make a difference to someone who's going away.
not responding to vulnerability, gives a pain that no amount of morphine,( or fentanyl ) can relief.
this evening, i bumped into K, again. we started talking. the usual introductions. and somehow we talked about God. oh, because my name is sarah. that was alright till he offered to walk home together. (the weather is a good excuse). but he hopped on the SRC anyway. K was nice in my most humble and wise opinion. somewhat harmless but ure nv too sure. however, over friendly. either that, i was paranoid. and there was a period of awkward silence. i dun like that kinda vibes, cause i roughly know where its gonna lead. and my defences kicked in fast, i felt to vulnerable. not because i was afraid of physical harm, but of something else inside, i cant figure out what. and to be honest, i dont want it to matter.
times are just different now.
and it's been a really long day. night world.
Saturday, February 17, 2007
The Answer(s)
It started with the call. I wasn't really expecting it, to be honest. But it was good. CM said many things-jokes, casual stuff, snort-ed *oinK* even, but there was one thing CM said that made me realise...that everything was under Control. i had been anxious, and i did feel lost about everything. I felt that i was trying hard to make things better, to read people, to read the situation. But all i could see before me was a haze. my life had lacked clarity.
and to confess, i felt "unloved, unwanted, undesired."
That afternoon, i thought we were drowning on dry land. I poured it all out to God, because i didnt know where else i could go to. or rather, i didnt want to go anywhere.
That night, my answers came.
im truly thankful for the strength offered by CM, but there was something more than just it.
The Lord reinforced something valuable i needed, we all need to know.
Our core validation needs to come from God. Because no one can give us enough to fill those spaces inside, and there will always be spaces and questions we want answers to. and if we were looking to the wrong places to get all these, it makes things, relationships, our lives, really messsy..it hurts people we love, it hurts ourselves--There's a limit to what this world can offer.
"A woman once said, "I still feel useless. I am not a woman. I do not have a man. I have failed to captivate someone." The ache is real. but the verdict is false. Only God can tell you who you are. Only God can speak the answer you need to hear. In love, we can bring such joy and healing as we offer one another our strength and beauty. But our core validation has to come from God."- John eldredgem, captivating
and i believe the same goes for masculinity. a woman can offer him so much- be his ezer, his companion, his inspiration, but she cannot be the validation of his soul. we all need to take our question to Him.
i guess, this is one big lesson I have learnt over the years. You know, its hard to do so sometimes, because so many things in this world point us in other directions- our looks, being popular, being cool, being "accepted" by society, driving big cars, needing to portray an image of being "in", being powerful and smart, being in authority, being happy and loved, being seen as able to cope with everyting... all that... ive been there, some of them. really, and i know its so tempting sometimes. but all i can say at the end of these, is that its "fake". everyone is hiding behind a little mask. trying so hard to please, trying so hard to fill spaces and questions inside us.
and we are tired. so tired. and lonely.
no want likes to admit they are lonely, no want likes to admit that they have tried and failed, no one likes to admit they are struggling, no one likes to ask for love. no one likes to appear weak.
but there's nothing wrong in being who we were made to be.
i wish, we could be more sensitive to the needs of those around us, we could be accepting and embracing when someone asks for help. when someone indirectly asks for love- even when they try so hard to grasp our attention through silly things. I wish, we would all learn to be vulnerable, to ask for things we desperately need. to show we need love. maybe then, people would really be more joyful. Trust.
Ask Him. Because He is always there. If you believe that life and destiny have all been planned for, and He holds the key to all mysteries, then i guess the wisest thing to do is to turn to Him.
we bang our hopes on time, time will heal all wounds, time will change things, time will do this and that.... couldnt time be a device invented by man, inspired by God, to bring more order and structure into things? isnt time in His hands
This are what comfort me and bring me hope.That in Christ, who has loved us with an everlasting love, i have hope that my life can be better. even more so, the lives of people dear to me, can be better. i truly want that, and i take these to the Lord in prayer, everyday.
so ive decided to add 1 more item to my list of banned complaints:
1) "Im so sad...."
2) "Im growing fat!....."
3) "im unloved and unwanted and undesired..."- utter rubbish and any person would be able to oppose that, but do we really know? do we really believe? get to the core of it, believe and you shall see.
and to confess, i felt "unloved, unwanted, undesired."
That afternoon, i thought we were drowning on dry land. I poured it all out to God, because i didnt know where else i could go to. or rather, i didnt want to go anywhere.
That night, my answers came.
im truly thankful for the strength offered by CM, but there was something more than just it.
The Lord reinforced something valuable i needed, we all need to know.
Our core validation needs to come from God. Because no one can give us enough to fill those spaces inside, and there will always be spaces and questions we want answers to. and if we were looking to the wrong places to get all these, it makes things, relationships, our lives, really messsy..it hurts people we love, it hurts ourselves--There's a limit to what this world can offer.
"A woman once said, "I still feel useless. I am not a woman. I do not have a man. I have failed to captivate someone." The ache is real. but the verdict is false. Only God can tell you who you are. Only God can speak the answer you need to hear. In love, we can bring such joy and healing as we offer one another our strength and beauty. But our core validation has to come from God."- John eldredgem, captivating
and i believe the same goes for masculinity. a woman can offer him so much- be his ezer, his companion, his inspiration, but she cannot be the validation of his soul. we all need to take our question to Him.
i guess, this is one big lesson I have learnt over the years. You know, its hard to do so sometimes, because so many things in this world point us in other directions- our looks, being popular, being cool, being "accepted" by society, driving big cars, needing to portray an image of being "in", being powerful and smart, being in authority, being happy and loved, being seen as able to cope with everyting... all that... ive been there, some of them. really, and i know its so tempting sometimes. but all i can say at the end of these, is that its "fake". everyone is hiding behind a little mask. trying so hard to please, trying so hard to fill spaces and questions inside us.
and we are tired. so tired. and lonely.
no want likes to admit they are lonely, no want likes to admit that they have tried and failed, no one likes to admit they are struggling, no one likes to ask for love. no one likes to appear weak.
but there's nothing wrong in being who we were made to be.
i wish, we could be more sensitive to the needs of those around us, we could be accepting and embracing when someone asks for help. when someone indirectly asks for love- even when they try so hard to grasp our attention through silly things. I wish, we would all learn to be vulnerable, to ask for things we desperately need. to show we need love. maybe then, people would really be more joyful. Trust.
Ask Him. Because He is always there. If you believe that life and destiny have all been planned for, and He holds the key to all mysteries, then i guess the wisest thing to do is to turn to Him.
we bang our hopes on time, time will heal all wounds, time will change things, time will do this and that.... couldnt time be a device invented by man, inspired by God, to bring more order and structure into things? isnt time in His hands
This are what comfort me and bring me hope.That in Christ, who has loved us with an everlasting love, i have hope that my life can be better. even more so, the lives of people dear to me, can be better. i truly want that, and i take these to the Lord in prayer, everyday.
so ive decided to add 1 more item to my list of banned complaints:
1) "Im so sad...."
2) "Im growing fat!....."
3) "im unloved and unwanted and undesired..."- utter rubbish and any person would be able to oppose that, but do we really know? do we really believe? get to the core of it, believe and you shall see.
Friday, February 16, 2007
The sentimental Fool
of late, ive not been sleeping well. im tired, but when i lay down to sleep, an entire truckload of thoughts just cross my mind. then i enter a world of strange dreams and surreal reality, where i feel im almost exsiting. and i meet people i know or hardly know and have encounters with them-which in real life if it did happen would bring me up to cloud 9. unfortunately, i wake up, realising its all my imagination, and it feels like ive never rested at all.
ive got a nice bed though. a nice room. I think its God's gift to me. a huge double bedroom with some hugh quality mattress, white cotton sheets with lace trimmings at the end. a thick and warm duvet. sheer white translucent curtains over white window panes. biege carpet floor. dark rosewood bedside drawers. a single white lily in a glass, at the window. u get the picture. It's a great comfort during this time. thank you...
clinics was cancelled. Frging consultant didnt show up. consultants. i had walked 45 min to the hospital. and now, i sit in the SL without the book i need. what a day, seriously..
i feel like waiting for lunch time, but then again, why wait when u know the invite might not come?
last night i prayed for 2 really sweet things, the 1st will be of no meaning if said. the 2nd goes something like this:
"Dear Lord, please snuggle up my loved ones with loads of warmth and tender love, just like you've kept me warm in my blanket. Because it's always nice to feel loved, and i want them to feel loved. i want them to be happy..."
im going home to sleep and get some TLC.
ive got a nice bed though. a nice room. I think its God's gift to me. a huge double bedroom with some hugh quality mattress, white cotton sheets with lace trimmings at the end. a thick and warm duvet. sheer white translucent curtains over white window panes. biege carpet floor. dark rosewood bedside drawers. a single white lily in a glass, at the window. u get the picture. It's a great comfort during this time. thank you...
clinics was cancelled. Frging consultant didnt show up. consultants. i had walked 45 min to the hospital. and now, i sit in the SL without the book i need. what a day, seriously..
i feel like waiting for lunch time, but then again, why wait when u know the invite might not come?
last night i prayed for 2 really sweet things, the 1st will be of no meaning if said. the 2nd goes something like this:
"Dear Lord, please snuggle up my loved ones with loads of warmth and tender love, just like you've kept me warm in my blanket. Because it's always nice to feel loved, and i want them to feel loved. i want them to be happy..."
im going home to sleep and get some TLC.
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
The repentence
This part of my life is called: being walled in. to the desert. wanting to be romanced by Him. and Him alone.
it all began on the 21st of January 2007.
On that faithful day, like the prophecy in Hosea, this happened.
(3)"I will make her like a desert
turn her into a parched land,
and slay her with thirst."
(6)"Therefore i will block her path with thornbushes
I will wall her in so that she cannot find her way.
She will chase after lovers but not catch them;
she will look for them but not find them
Then she will say,
"I will go back to my husband as it is at first
for then I was better off than now."
(14)"therefore I am going to allure here'
I will lead her into the desert
and speak tenderly to her.
There I will give her back her vineyards
and will make the Valley of Achor a door of hope."
(16)"In that day, declares the Lord,
"you will call me 'my husband', you will no longer call me
'my master.'"
(19)"I will bethroth you to me forever
I will bethroth you in righteousness and justice
in love and compassion
I will betroth you in faithfulness
and you will acknowledge the Lord."
this may seem like a really abstract concept to some.
in as best simple words can mean,
i believe that God, has really took me out of "lala land" suddenly, and place me in a dry and lonley desert place. and i believe, that as time unfolds, He will allure me, romance me, so passionately, so fiercely, that I, will no longer just know Him as my Father, my saviour, my King, my Lord, but "my husband", my lover". and if you, at this point are starting to think im "sick" or smth, then perhaps its time to stop thinking that romance, is simply about flowers, the opposite sex, yeah and sex, chocolates, EMO-ing, movies etc. Romance, is deep. its not a girl thing, fell0w brothers, its a human thing.
it all began on the 21st of January 2007.
On that faithful day, like the prophecy in Hosea, this happened.
(3)"I will make her like a desert
turn her into a parched land,
and slay her with thirst."
(6)"Therefore i will block her path with thornbushes
I will wall her in so that she cannot find her way.
She will chase after lovers but not catch them;
she will look for them but not find them
Then she will say,
"I will go back to my husband as it is at first
for then I was better off than now."
(14)"therefore I am going to allure here'
I will lead her into the desert
and speak tenderly to her.
There I will give her back her vineyards
and will make the Valley of Achor a door of hope."
(16)"In that day, declares the Lord,
"you will call me 'my husband', you will no longer call me
'my master.'"
(19)"I will bethroth you to me forever
I will bethroth you in righteousness and justice
in love and compassion
I will betroth you in faithfulness
and you will acknowledge the Lord."
this may seem like a really abstract concept to some.
in as best simple words can mean,
i believe that God, has really took me out of "lala land" suddenly, and place me in a dry and lonley desert place. and i believe, that as time unfolds, He will allure me, romance me, so passionately, so fiercely, that I, will no longer just know Him as my Father, my saviour, my King, my Lord, but "my husband", my lover". and if you, at this point are starting to think im "sick" or smth, then perhaps its time to stop thinking that romance, is simply about flowers, the opposite sex, yeah and sex, chocolates, EMO-ing, movies etc. Romance, is deep. its not a girl thing, fell0w brothers, its a human thing.
"Romance is the deepest thing in life.
It is deeper than reality."
- G.K. Chesterton
I believe, as a christian, Ive got a long way to go.
it is true, that I have given my heart-the most precious part of a woman, to many things. i have loved God. But is it enough? is it a single-hearted devotion? or have i been adulterous and unfaithful?
thus, the desert.
its a painful thing to have to go through. honestly, ive been struggling to accept the realities. Im a really stubborn kid, if u know me. yet, such a girl.. I even told God, "fine! if you want me to yourself, then i want you to myself as well! i dun care, i want to be jealous too. i want all the attention from you to myself.." haha i know, i know, its silly, and i dun mean it in a disrespectful way. but u get what i mean.
But i believe in hope. I believe that when ive survived that desert, whenever i do, i would, experience the greatest love of all. and i would, find life, in learning to love my God. not just a mere feeling, but a fierce, holy, passionate love.
so im holding on. i know its worth it.
day 1: God has an incredible sense of humour, its valentine's day. haha. some sunshine, some love from the cell. so far, its not too bad. i even got roses- its a sign of God's love for me through people. im thankful.
im a human-im scared "shit" sometimes (as ambika calls it), i feel so lonely ( a lie i need to resist), i feel so disappointed and unloved (the worst lie people should never believe), a myraid of emos. so i need the support, i confess. i need the prayers, we need your prayers- it changes lives, it does. i need the word- need to help myself on that. take it one step at a time- (good advice)
i need rest.
Thank You.
Monday, February 12, 2007
one of our friend, rebecca decided to visit her old school, up in Perth. No, not aussie perth. but a city up north in scotland. Ommena borrowed rebecca's dad's car, and drove us up! 1.5 hours on the motorway.. quite good driving i must say, though we had a few hits and misses here and there. haha. thank God for hannah who was the co-pilot in the front seat. hannah was up from london for a couple of days, hence our mini reunion. it was good fun, for a no-pbl-saturday. initially i dragged myself outta bed at 830..plus it was absolutely freezing!..well, i guess i still got to go to perth afterall! But i was so sad when i saw the photos they took and dear sabiha said she kinda missed me! aye. oh, and after we retuned that afternoon, gordon, jean and i went to ASDA 24 to get groceries. i baked somemore when i came back that night- blueberry muffins with cinnamon crusts.
anyway, here's perth, enjoy:)
"i miss my doggy at home!"
anyway, here's perth, enjoy:)
"i miss my doggy at home!"
it was snowing really heavily as we drove up north scotland, wind, rain and slate too! we finally reached rebecca's boarding school- Glenalmond College! man, its so beautiful! the acres of land! there was a criquet coout, a tennis court, a large field, swimming pool, natural beauty! ooh. imagine studying here...oh we met this 14 yr old boy with his doggie-oscar. its a golden retriever like my rocky back home! it was soooo playful but i love him to bits. "little baby!!"we had a snow fight with tt boy and he refused to stop even when we were driivng off. arghhh. boys at that age.... really got on my nerves i must say. haha!
Perth, scotland, 10th February 2007
Let it snow! let it snow! let it snow!and wash all that doesnt know purity away
Sunday, February 11, 2007
Baking Frenzy
So, we decided to bake-as it was supposed to be good for our oestrogen-raging flat(s). on thursday afternoon, ambika and i went to partick morrison's to get all the stuff we needed, but we forgot to get more milk- didnt know we needed that much! thursday evening-cooked a really sumptious meal for 3: salmon Bhunah curry, fried chicken wings, bacon-lettuce-sweetcorn fried jap rice- forgot to take photos:(
Friday came, and our batch mates were supposed to have a sleep over at michelle kui's place. BUT BUT these bummers... decided to cancel it last minute cause they were toooo lazy and sleepy from coursework?!? what kind of reeason is that!!! anyway, the highly unsatisified ambika and i decided to make something good out of a friday evening- so we baked. no clubbing, no watching tv, no stoning , but productive refining of skills. blueberry muffins, chocolate chip muffins, fairy cupcakes, and more blueberry muffins with cinammon crusts! yummy!
Wednesday, February 07, 2007
it's sub-zero here in glasgow! so cold...brrrr.. but thank God for the sun, still:)
i think life would be really horrible and depressing if it were raining and gloomy in this temperature, im not ready for it:( BUT its sunny! awesome sunrises at 7ish!
i walked 45 min to gartnavel hospital this morning. so long.. SSM (special study module) is starting on Monday, and Pain management (which is what 16 of us are doing) is based there. 45 min everyday?!? i dont need the gym anymore!heeh.
this weekend- is going to be smashing. it doesn matter if i dont get to go to the ball (cinderella story sigh. just that i dont have a fairy godmother)... ill go on a baking therapy like izzy stevens did, and ill go swimming (hopefully), and ill watch ugly Betty at rasti's, go shopping (maybe), do some crazy colouring with the mad babe, and ill be a good girl serving at chinese school.
Hmmp!!
*GRRRRRRR*
i think life would be really horrible and depressing if it were raining and gloomy in this temperature, im not ready for it:( BUT its sunny! awesome sunrises at 7ish!
i walked 45 min to gartnavel hospital this morning. so long.. SSM (special study module) is starting on Monday, and Pain management (which is what 16 of us are doing) is based there. 45 min everyday?!? i dont need the gym anymore!heeh.
this weekend- is going to be smashing. it doesn matter if i dont get to go to the ball (cinderella story sigh. just that i dont have a fairy godmother)... ill go on a baking therapy like izzy stevens did, and ill go swimming (hopefully), and ill watch ugly Betty at rasti's, go shopping (maybe), do some crazy colouring with the mad babe, and ill be a good girl serving at chinese school.
Hmmp!!
*GRRRRRRR*
Tuesday, February 06, 2007
The sun that brings light across the winter sky, every single day since.. is your sign of love for me- thank you Lord Jesus.
i remember, and hope to be reminded in the coming days
"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything present your requests to God. And the grace of God, which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in christ Jesus."
- Philippians 4:6-7
i remember, and hope to be reminded in the coming days
"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything present your requests to God. And the grace of God, which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in christ Jesus."
- Philippians 4:6-7
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
