i had an enjoyable weekend at meritus mandarin. daddy got complimentary stay at regency suite, so the whole jean gang went down to lead a decadent Life as celisa claims, for 3 days and 2 nights. It was good because i shopped quite a lot! and i got to meet up with friends whom i missed, and won't be seeing for sometime..

im on a perpetual sleep log clearance though.
feeling so tired-physically. never loved sleep this much.

currently,
im just letting the days go by-slacking, meeting up with people. spending time with my family. for once, i dun feel as if i have to chase after something. and it feels so weird! i remember aunty lanfong told me once that i seem to be running after something all my life. chasing things. quite true.. im such a runner, such that if i dun run after what i want, i will feel so listless. Like how i'm feeling right now.

grrr. i admit i can be quite impatient with dealing with certain things in my life. waiting on God seems tough. But i must say its getitng better now. definitely can do better.. i really need to pray.

as christmas and the new year approaches, i would like to find some time for myself to reflect upon 2005. i officially name it the most eventful and difficult year of my life. so much has happened in a relatively short period of time (if u measure 1 yr against eternity that is), and i believe there are so many lessons to be learnt. I definitely do not want to make the same mistakes and unwise decisions again. all the more, i want to remember what God has given, taught and taken away from me, i want to rememeber all this before 1st jan 2006. not because im a sadist, because theres this desire for me to lean on someone greater for directions. the bigger picture belongs to Him. nothing i plan will ever come true if He doesn allow it.

i want to remember all that has been laid down for me, how i was saved from the raging seas, how i was given a second chance at so many.

aye, the prob is, why am i back to square one-a state of uncertainty and doubt and fear? i dislike it. why am i quite ingrateful?i must wake myself up from my dreams.

-this is a terribly random post which u wouldn understand, so dont bother thinking hard-